easily distracted

Why am I so obsessed with cat feet? I must always pet cat feet when they are near. THEY ARE SO DAMN CUTE!

(1) I’ve been having sexy dreams about the pretzels at Easy Tiger.

(2) WE TIED FOR FIRST AT GEEK BOWL VI!!!! When our team name was called we all had “Oscar face” (y’know, that ARE YOU SHITTING ME look). And then we buckled under the pressure of an on-stage tie-breaking round. I will never again forget the following:
Michelle Obama is the child of Fraser and Marian Robinson;
the currency of Hong Kong is THE (Hong Kong) DOLLAR;
Bernie Madoff was sentenced to 150 years in prison,
there are only TWO UN member nations whose name begins with a “Z” (why do I keep forgetting that Zaire changed its name?!), and
Michael Jordan was a five-time regular season MVP (150 x 2 - 5 = 295).

There was another question we tanked, but I don’t remember that one. I hope it never gets asked again!

Yeah, not gonna lie. I pretty much forgot I had a tumblr until I was clearing out my approved applications on Facebook. And then for a week or so it didn’t cross my mind again. Not sure why I’ve decided to care now, but the “new year” thing got to me and I decided to once again try to be good at this blogging stuff.

It’s been six months and a boatload of stuff went down. If anyone who reads this (does anyone read this?) follows me on FB, G+, or Twitter you know this stuff so you can skip ahead.

• In August I stepped in an unfortunately placed pothole (read: along the curb where I parked my car at a meter) and tore three ligaments in my right ankle. I was finally released back into the wild on October 18th.
• In September Lazer and I celebrated our 7th anniversary. We still have no plans to get married. But if we ever do, I have black Vera Wang and Christian Dior gowns already picked out.
• Fantastic Fest happened and I volunteered again. Made some great new friends including the awesome screenwriter of the The Corridor, Josh McDonald. If only Olias Barco (director of Kill Me Please, which I still need to see) and I had become pen pals.
• The day after I was finished with PT Lazer and I went on our first non-family vacation in several years. We went to visit awesome friends in LA. I fell hopelessly in love with West Hollywood. I now want to move there.
• While in LA I met Leslie Jordan. He told me (us) a good story. I can die now.
• We returned from LA on October 25th. On October 27th I was in a car accident that totaled my car and jacked me up pretty good. Since then I have been recovering from neck/back damage, a broken ankle, more torn [ankle] ligaments, and tendinitis. Yes, it was the same ankle from before.

So here we are in January. I’m still going to PT for my ankle and I still want to move to West Hollywood. (Want to give me a well-paying job?) Not a whole lot else has happened yet. But I have decided to start purging. Stuff & people though, not my food. Food is too awesome.

Oh, and I will be 37 this year. It’s freaking me out! :(

P.S.: Meet my new friends.

Surprise! Once again I have been lax with my tumblring, but I’ve been concentrating a lot on G+. It has some kinks to work out, but I’m really a fan (reminder: http://gplus.to/thejanice). Ugh, I need to get my shit together. I keep saying I want to turn this into something good. We all know everything that flows from my fingers is pure gold, but, as previously discussed, I am pretty lazy.

I am not prepared to catch up on my best/worst meal. For over a week now all food/beverage that I have consumed has angered the gut gods and at this point I don’t remember what I ate before July 16. So even if it tasted good, I felt like total crap after, which puts everything on a level playing field. At the doctor’s request I have temporarily cut out dairy and fried foods and I have been trying to take a probiotic. (No, those friend pickles with ranch did NOT count. What happens at Master Pancake stays at Master Pancake.) The doctor thinks it may be gallbladder-related, which makes sense if you know anything about the ladies of my family. Blood test results came back normal though.

(FYI: I HAVE PERFECT BLOOD SUGAR! suck on that!)

In other news, you may or may not be a fan of chick flicks but Friends With Benefits (Timberlake/Kunis) was pretty dang funny. I definitely enjoyed it more than the Kutcher/Portman version of the “friends who try to have a non-committal sexual relationship” tale that came out earlier this year. I  found Kunis’s character more personally relatable I suppose. Plus, she’s hot like whoa.

I’ll leave you with this affirmation. It is totally normal to sing songs to your cats.

I’ve been eating cantaloupe, along with watermelon and some grapes, nearly every morning for breakfast. It has totally been improving my mood, at least for a little while until the day’s disasters strike. So I think I’m going to just come straight out of the gate declaring breakfast cantaloupe as my best meal of the week. And I am going to bestow the honor of worst meal to the cucumbers I got from the office cafeteria. Horribly bitter and nearly ruined my (slightly modified) caprese salad.

I also got a new girlfriend this week. She’s beautiful and classy. She’s obviously “the better half” in this partnership. Meet Fancy Lola.

I’ve also ventured into the world of Google+. I like it for the most part. But I really don’t get people who sign up and make posts to the tune of  ”OK, now what?” You joined a social network. Be social. Engage the people you’ve purposefully linked yourself to. If you have no idea what G+ is or the point of it all, read anyone of the gazillion articles out there or just don’t join up. I’m not saying I win at G+, but I am saying you can throw me in a circle and you might be moderately informed/amused. http://gplus.to/thejanice

I have been [mildly] obsessed with a few things recently.

• cantaloupe with black pepper – FYI, anything in the melon family tastes amazing with black pepper!
• cucumber water
• https://ooliveoil.com/ - I found the jalapeno-lime olive oil at my neighborhood H-E-B. I’m also really, really interested in the blood orange olive tapenade, citrus-champagne vinegar, and yuzu rice vinegar. 
• Hello Giggles
• campy shows on ABC Family – Okay, this has actually been going on for a while (Greek, Make It or Break It, Pretty Little Liars), but it’s getting worse (better?) with the new shows this summer season (Switched at Birth, The Nine Lives of Chloe King). 

This was a surprisingly low-stress week at work aside from moving offices. My new spot is smaller and I see people pass by my window all day long, but I’m learning to like my digs. I’ve already settled in and have my stuff all set up, including my new Harry Potter Lego set. 

I fee like I’m lacking focus outside of work though (more than usual). I’m not sure if it’s just me being lame/lazy or if it’s because work has me so tired. I feel like I need to be more creative, but my brain is a big ol’ blank. I’m also thinking I should turn this blog into something with more focus, but I feel as though the blogosphere is so saturated with things I’m interested in (fashion, beauty, food, tv, & movies). And I’m just not sure I can muster the brain power necessary to find a way to differentiate myself, right now anyway. There’s also that oh-so-common self doubt-y thought “who really gives a shit what I think?” Blah blah blah. Wah wah wah. I suppose my mid-30s are just making me obnoxiously introspective and mid-life-crisis-y. Just ignore me, I’m totally having a LiveJournal moment.

On the other hand, I’m pretty proud of myself. Usually when I get the blahs it leads to massive amounts of shopping (clothes & shoes), but I’ve managed to limit my spending and (mostly) focus it on practical things for the house, like a pretty fatigue mat for the kitchen.

And in more good news, I went back to trivia for the first time in forever. We won. Team Dong is unstoppable!

Best meal: pizza made at home (thin crust, jalapeno tomato sauce, asparagus, green olives, italian 4-cheese blend)
Worst meal: mediocre salad from the work cafeteria salad bar 

Working too much. Again. So I’ll just say a few things and do another best/worst.

(1) I work too much. (Wait, did I already say that?) This needs to stop. I left work today at 8:30pm. Not cool. (I got there at 8:30am.) My new mandate: no more than 2 hours of overtime per day and no more than 8 hours of overtime per week. Even that sounds depressing.

(2) Thankfully the excessive working hasn’t screwed up my left arm again. I enjoy having use of it.

(3) I missed out on tickets to a midnight screening of Harry Potter. :( *shakes fist at work*

(4) I finally saw Bridesmaids again. BRIGHT SPOT! It was just as funny the second time around. Maybe even funnier. I noticed a few subtle laughs I missed the first time around. I love you, Kristen Wiig.

(5) I went to a lovely, worthy-cause charity event for Grounded in Music. It was a fancy hat & champagne event. My hat wasn’t so fancy, but the champagne & sparkling wine was yum. There were some really interesting champagne cocktails that I’ll have to try on my own (add homemade flavored simple syrup). And the sommelier-led tasting had my favorite Schramsberg Blanc de Blancs (2007). Yes, I know it’s technically a sparkling wine, but just know that they hold themselves to the same set of rules followed by sparkling wines from the Champagne region of France. </end nerd talk> And the Travaasa Austin was gorgeous! I almost didn’t notice that it was painfully hot outside.

(6) Best meal: asparagus + jalapeno + red onion pizza from Salvation. my favorite pizza.

(7) Worst meal: we bought gluten-free pasta made with pea protein. it was so gross.

(8) OH YEA! Buffy has not been slaying roads lately. I am disappointed in her. First her battery dies out of nowhere (no warning wheezes) and then she goes and picks up a giant nail. A new battery and a new tire all in the same week. I smell sabotage.

(9) October can’t come soon enough!

(10) I just wanted this to be even.

Okay, I am a little behind on my first best meal/worst meal post so this first one will cover the last week and a half.

Best Meal: hands down it would be (last night’s) dinner at Blanco Cafe’s original location at Blanco & Elsemere in San Antonio. I had my usual cheese enchilada plate w/ ranchero sauce and double rice. Any week I have this meal it’s the best by default, but since I’ve made it my first I’ll disqualify it in the future.

Worst Meal: definitely Monday’s dinner at Cafe on the Square in San Marcos. I had grilled cheese + jalapeno with onion rings. Seemingly innocuous, but it the bread was greasy, the cheese wasn’t properly melted, and the onion rings were on par with the store-brand frozen kind. To be fair, it wasn’t terrible. I mean, I *did* eat it. But for an established, well-reviewed cafe I expected something better than what I can get at Sonic. 

Genius! On the drive home I had a great idea for a weekly post: best meal/worst meal.

Work has been consuming my life lately. In recent weeks I’ve been averaging more than 10 hrs/day. That’s just gross. However, it looks like I’ll leave the office today BEFORE the sun sets. WOO! And tomorrow is an early dismissal day. (Thanks, Office of the CEO!) And I scheduled a 90-minute theraputic massage for tomorrow afternoon with a woman called Olga. (Sounds terribly promising, right?!) And it’s a three-day weekend. And I’ve got a trip to the salon planned for Saturday. And my friend Lou will be here on Saturday. (He’s always fun.) When you add all of these things together it makes for a promising weekend that should result in a rested Janice with the (hopefully) renewed ability to hug. (My left arm isn’t all that interested in raising above my shoulder, if that!)

Now that the informative portion of our chat is out of the way, what prompted me to post something in the first place was this:
Why do I allow myself to get so angry when a Black-Eyed Peas song creeps into my head?

Bye.

P.S. I am wearing a vest and I obviously like parentheses (obviously). And I (obviously) like the word “and.”

The mylar balloon my mom gave me for my birthday is rubbing against the wall making creepy noises. I don’t like it. It’s freaking me out.

Also, I just caught up on Vampire Diaries (yeah, yeah, I know). The last episode totes made me cry. #loser

That is all.

My lovely friend Karen took me out for a belated birthday lunch on Tuesday and I got one of the best Engrish-y fortunes that I’ve seen in quite some time.

And when I got home, my day got even better. My gift from Lazer finally arrived all the way from BRAZIL!

Random Musing: Why don’t people utilize the “mute” button if they’re not speaking on a conference call? Hearing other people’s heavy breathing is really creepy.

Well, really because the previous blog post was already too long, I am throwing a short one together to talk about other events from last week.

WEDNESDAY:
I signed up for a skeeball league. I am really not a fan of forced punny names, but that seems to be a requirement so we are MC 900 Ft Skeesus. I am also supposed to come up with a nickname for myself. I have three ideas: (1) just change the spelling of my last name to Noskee; (2) Booger Assassin; (3) Snotty J. That’s all I’ve got.

THURSDAY:
I went to a lovely little event, P.S. – A Paramount/Stateside Affair, at the Paramount Theatre/Stateside Theatre. Coordinated by my new friend (Nighttime) Nick Barbieri along with Tolly Mosely of Austin Eavesdropper, it was a social networking/blogger event to launch the newly-renovated Stateside Theatre and promote the Paramount’s Summer Film Series.  I am just going to come right out and say this, I WANT TO EAT HER UP WITH A SPOON! So cute. She’s so much more driven and focused than me that this adoration is definitely tinged with some faux hate. Grrr! Also, she looks much cuter in the event photos than I do. (NO I WILL NOT LINK TO THEM!) When will I learn how to take a proper photo and stop looking like a I require a helmet and short bus? WAH! It shouldn’t take 50 tries before I stop looking dumb. No, seriously.

K BYE!

Yes, that’s right. Yesterday was a big day in Janiceland. I had a birthday, making me 36. I am now officially closer to 40 than 30. I had a surprisingly easy time turning 30, but this one is really getting to me. Only the gnomes churning the wheels in my brain really know why. It just is what it is. Regardless, this was a weekend of celebration.

FRIDAY:
We started off with dinner at Second Bar + Kitchen. This is our second visit, the first being for Lazer’s birthday soirée back in February. Once again I was not disappointed. A few of the menu items were still around, but many had been updated to work with seasonal ingredients or were replaced entirely to make way for spring/summer treats. The cocktail that Becca hipped me to last visit (Pilgrim’s Afternoon: white port, cranberry seltzer, citrus) was gone from the menu, but the bartender obliged my request. HOORAY! The chicken-fried pimento-cheese-stuffed olives also made a repeat appearance. I could eat a bucket of those things. NO JOKES! New to the menu was a corn gazpacho and given the heat we’ve been experiencing it sounded like a welcome break from hot food. I WAS NOT WRONG. It was excellent and I want to eat it every day!!! I also repeated my order of gnocchi since it was one of the updated dishes. The sauce was lighter and brighter in flavor, definitely a good fit for summer, and it gets another thumbs up. And because it was my birthday we HAD TO HAVE dessert. I ordered the buttermilk pecan pie. It was really good, but I didn’t have any religious moments or anything. Maybe that’s because I grew up with a grandfather who made some of the best pecan pie I’ve ever had the pleasure of inhaling.

corn gazpacho

buttermilk pecan pie

The rest of Friday night was spent at the Paramount Theatre for the late show of Craig Ferguson. I really enjoyed him (the opener was okay, but nothing noteworthy, for me atleast). I laughed and grinned so much my face hurt when all was said and done. GREAT START to a dreaded birthday weekend.

SATURDAY:
Things got off to a slow start, but we eventually made it to San Antonio and Blanco Cafe. If you’ve known me for more than five seconds you know that this is my gold standard for casual Mexican food (I call it kitchen-Mex). The tortillas are homemade, the salsa ranchera is out of this world, and they have the best verde salsa EVER. It’s not your traditional over-vinegared tomatillo salsa. Instead it’s just hot and pepper-y. Every time I go home I insist on going to Blanco and I bring back at least one 12-oz container of the stuff. This time I brought home three, but two are gifties. (I AM A GREAT FRIEND!) Post-lunch I got my mom & dad to meet us at Cavender’s to go boot shopping. (It sounds weird, right?) After I posted the picture of the brown boots I purchased a few weeks back, my mom has been wanting to borrow them. Instead, my sister and I decided to throw in and get her a pair for an (early) Mother’s Day gift. She was super excited. Not only did we find her a pair, I got some new boots, too.

more boots

Saturday evening marked the family birthday dinner. This year I dragged them to Auden’s Kitchen (new-ish venture from Biga on the Banks’s Bruce Auden). My dad can be a difficult diner between his limited food likes and his memory problems, so this was a gamble but it totally paid off! He devoured his buttermilk-fried chicken; we were afraid he was going to start eating the bones! I had a tomato-cheese pizza that had really great flavor, but the crust was a bit too flimsy to support the weight of the large tomato slices. I really loved my Hop Czar beer though! If I ever get there again, I think I’ll go back to the mac & cheese. I had sexy food dreams about that dish. Or maybe I’ll try something new. Everyone else was extremely pleased with their food. I was seriously eying the sticky toffee pudding (Biga’s recipe), but my mom had a birthday cake at home. She couldn’t find the candles, so I blew out a tea light. Heh.

beer:

birthday cake:

SUNDAY:
This was the actual day of my birth, but it was serving as an early Mother’s Day celebration. We went to brunch at Le Peep. The food was the same as last time. Pretty good, but nothing better than you generally expect at a reputable brunch spot. After this, we had a bit more family time before Lazer and I headed off to celebrate with my birthday twin, Vanessa. We met up with her at The Cove. Several people have asked me about this place since its appearance on “Diners, Drive-ins, and Dives” but this was my first experience. It’s very unusual: bar & grill, laundromat, and self-serve car wash. The beer selection was impressive and the menu had several vegetarian-friendly options though they are phasing out the hummus plate (ugh!). Still full from brunch, we just had drinks (Independence Stash IPA, Duvel, Boylan sodas - yum!) and chips y salsa. Their fire-roasted salsa was even better than Rosario’s, in my opinion. The rest of my (actual) birthday consisted of driving home, eating Thai food on the couch, and catching up on TV. Totally an old person’s birthday, but I am just fine with that.

I bought a replacement bike last weekend (yea!) and rode it for the first time this week. Lazer and I woke up a bit late and rode up to the neighborhood coffeeshop for bagels and chai. Then we invited my sister wife to meet us. That resulted in me drinking almost an entire pitcher of mimosas by myself. How did I not get drunk? Weird.

After that we decided to find me a floppy sun hat and drove across town to Nordstrom only to realize the mall was closed. EASTER FAIL! Instead, we went to Toy Joy where I scored an OWL PENHOLDER!!! EASTER WIN!

- - -

WTF is up with my DVR? A week or so ago it recorded something on the Golf network instead of “Destination Truth” on SyFy (set to record series). One time fluke? NOPE. Tonight we were going to watch this week’s episode of “Top Chef Masters” (also set to record series) but instead it recorded something on BET. AND it didn’t record the last episodes of “The Event” and ”Mad Love.” Who knows what else we’re missing! :( At least it didn’t mess with “Doctor Who.” I might have cried. Also, did “Mr. Sunshine” get canceled? It was hilarious and I miss it’s snappy theme song. *sigh*

- - -

I’m super stressed about planning something for my birthday and I’m totally doing it to myself. I always do a dinner thing, but then stress about people not wanting to spend money. This year I thought about making a dinner at the house and having everyone over to watch one of my faves, The Legend of Billy Jean, but the mere thought of fitting people in our house gave me heart palpitations. Can someone else plan this for once, please?

- - -

One last thing. Bridesmaids was outstanding. I laughed so hard I cried and I flat-out cried. I seriously can’t wait for the official release so I can watch it again. If you love funny and you love your ladies, please, see this flick!

I made out like a pirate bandit this weekend.
Friday: signed Gayroller 2000 print arrived
Saturday: gorgeous cut/color from Naomi @ Modesty  & a check for the last of my goods @ MOSS
Sunday: sassy new cowboy boots (pic below), grape licorice, & hot-like-fire orange lipstick (NARS Heat Wave semi-matte)

boots!

Unfortunately, this weekend wasn’t all candy and unicorns.
(1) The cops STILL haven’t called me about my stolen bike and I’m starting to think they never will.
(2) I took my car to H2O Handwash @ Lamar/Barton Springs to redeem my Groupon. For the most part, my car looked pretty. However, everything felt sticky inside, I still had to pick big strands of gross oak pollen off the floorboard and they didn’t rehook my driver’s-side floormat. There were also spots where you could tell they started to clean up dirt/grime, but didn’t finish it out. For a service that retails for $85, I expected a bit more. And had I been given the opportunity to see the finished product BEFORE I tipped, things would have gone down a bit different.
(3) I got a sunburn. :(

At least this week is looking promising. Tonight the plan is to FINALLY see Paul. Wednesday I have a preview screening of Bridesmaids on the calendar. And Thursday we’ll be in the park drinking beer and watching Strange Brew. Sometime in there I really need to figure out what I want to do for my birthday.

I really wish that cold snap would return. I got to bust out my blinged-out Estelle Getty sweater (below). I also prefer to wrap myself in blankets. Heat + humidity are not friends with sweaters and blankets. Heat + humidity are not friends with my lungs.

BEST CARDIGAN EVER! (Why yes, those ARE sequins!)

Lazer and I went to a friend’s birthday party on Friday night, out on a porch. I was miserable. It was only 80-ish, but I felt as though I were in a sauna. So gross. I don’t remember it always being this way, but it seems I can handle less and less each year. 

More downers this weekend:
(1) all of the friggin’ pollen (ugh, dying!);
(2) driving across town for Fat Tomato salsa and Costco being sold out despite getting it in stock yesterday. 

On the bright side, we got an awesome new chair today. I love it and so do the cats. It was our first trip to Uptown Modern and it was an instant success. This could become an issue though. I saw so many things I wanted to bring home. Eep!

I started a post mid-SXSW but was so exhausted that I kept falling asleep while typing. I could have sworn I saved it as a draft, but *POOF* it’s not there. I only vaguely remember what I was saying, but I am sure it had something to do with how much I enjoyed my small brushes with the Interactive and Film portions of the festival and how much I’ve come to dread the Music portion. It probably has something to do with me getting old, disliking [smelly] crowds, and general disappointment in the state of popular music. I mentioned to someone that it seems the more interested I have become in film the less interested I have become in new, live music. It probably also had something to do with how a random Twitter request for help with a place to stay during SXSW Film turned into tons of fun with new friends, Tom and Andy. I really hope they come back for aGLIFF in September!

Meet Andy:

Meet Tom:

Another SXSW bright spot was Lauren x 2 (Flax & Dillard), better known as Creep. I hadn’t seen Flax in years, so it was awesome to see her. It was my first time meeting Dillard and I <3 her! Their visit was sort-of whirlwind, which stinks. I hope I’ll get a chance to hop over to the City and visit both of them when Lazer and I are up in Long Island come August.

Meet Lauren Flax & Lauren Dillard:

On a totally different topic, a thought I’ve had several times before came to me again today. I would love to start a non-profit design coalition with the sole purpose of redesigning and copyediting the menus. I cry inside each time I see a menu marred by cheap clip art, crappy typography, and typos. Who’s with me?